Punched Chat Up

“Hello. My name’s ****, one of ****’s colleagues. I’m just going to shine this light in to your eyes, is that okay?”

“Umm… Sure.”

“Okay. Just hold still for a moment.” … “No, keep your eyes open for me.” … “Just look straight ahead, that’s it.”

“****, you have very beautiful eyes.”

*Blink* *Blink* *Blink*

“Uh… Thank you.”

It takes a second for me to realise that I’m being chatted up by some bloke, who has not only been hit around the head so hard that he can’t remember the incident, but is also so drunk the alcohol is practically crystallising out of his breath.

I turn to my colleague. His face is carefully blank, but I can see his chest twitching as he tries not to laugh. Over his shoulder I notice the rest of our teams conspicuous absence.

It’s going to be a while before I’m allowed to forget this.


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About The WalkingPlasterDispenser

So who is the Walking Plaster Dispenser? Well, I'm a volunteer First Aider, working with a well-known First Aid charity to help out random people I've never met before (or, more usually, when) they hurt themselves. This typically involves walking briskly (never run...) around after people who are silly enough to do sports or some other suitably daft activity in their free time. In my spare time, I am a graduate engineer, working my way through a graduate scheme with a big engineering company.

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