Punched Chat Up
“Hello. My name’s ****, one of ****’s colleagues. I’m just going to shine this light in to your eyes, is that okay?”
“Okay. Just hold still for a moment.” … “No, keep your eyes open for me.” … “Just look straight ahead, that’s it.”
“****, you have very beautiful eyes.”
*Blink* *Blink* *Blink*
“Uh… Thank you.”
It takes a second for me to realise that I’m being chatted up by some bloke, who has not only been hit around the head so hard that he can’t remember the incident, but is also so drunk the alcohol is practically crystallising out of his breath.
I turn to my colleague. His face is carefully blank, but I can see his chest twitching as he tries not to laugh. Over his shoulder I notice the rest of our teams conspicuous absence.
It’s going to be a while before I’m allowed to forget this.