Car vs Bike vs Hedgerow

I am not best pleased at the moment. I have just had a close encounter with some muppet in an expensive car. A very close encounter. Even closer than the normal encounters I have with cars on a daily basis in UniTown.

While cycling along what is normally a very quiet road, some lovely person decided it would be a good idea to drive as close to the edge of the road as possible, right past me… Now this isn’t a narrow road, so there is no real reason he couldn’t give me enough room. But no…

Faced with a car suddenly appearing in peripheral vision, far too close for comfort or, for that matter, safety, I had to take evasive maneuvers. One way was under the car, so I had to take the other, in to a hedge.

This was the normal sort of hedge you find by the side of a road where there isn’t a pavement: fill of brambles, nettles, prickly bushes and a tree. This did not make the softest or most comfortable of landings.

After a quick self check (head clear, neck feels fine, no severe pain anywhere) I picked myself up, hoping to see the car just down the road. Oh wait, that would be a no. They had hit me and then run off.

Once I had extricated myself from the bushes, I had a look over myself. No obvious signs of bleeding. No head or neck problems appeared. No limbs misbehaving. (Does anyone else think I might be a First Aider?)

Oh. My hands are swiftly swelling up. They obviously found the nettles, and I seem to be particularly sensitive. Perfect.

Self assessment over, I took a look at my bike. Thankfully it was only as rubbish as it had been when I’d left my house.

Happy that I was now probably safe to continue, I mounted up and continued on in to town. I registered a few strange looks from pedestrians, and assumed (wrongly) that it was because my face looked a little beat up.

Arriving in town, my hands felt like they were burning. It was the decision between getting to work on time, or getting some antihistamines. Which do you think won?

One oral antihistamine later, I was on the train, heading for WorkTown.

It was then that I discovered why people were looking at me funny. It turns out I had completely flattened part of my helmet. How I or my head didn’t notice this I have no idea. I didn’t even have a headache.

Incidentally, this is the second helmet I’ve put a proper dent in to. And people wonder why I wear them…

I had another surprise when I had a proper look at my bike on my way home. On the right handlebar, I found that I’d collected some paint. Car paint, to be specific. It seems that before I was dumped my bike managed to get a bit of revenge by itself. I can honestly say that this wasn’t my intention, but seeing it gave me the slight satisfaction of knowing that the driver would have to spend hopefully a not insignificant amount of money repairing that.

I know it’s not very charitable, but I think I have earned the right to be a little please about this…

Go carefully, you cyclists out there.


I had another self-examination, and thankfully all I found was a nice big bruise on my leg, and a couple of sore joints. Aside from the intense irritation from those bloody nettles (no pun intended), I seemed to get away quite lightly. Though I’ll probably feel it tomorrow…


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About The WalkingPlasterDispenser

So who is the Walking Plaster Dispenser? Well, I'm a volunteer First Aider, working with a well-known First Aid charity to help out random people I've never met before (or, more usually, when) they hurt themselves. This typically involves walking briskly (never run...) around after people who are silly enough to do sports or some other suitably daft activity in their free time. In my spare time, I am a graduate engineer, working my way through a graduate scheme with a big engineering company.

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  1. Drive Safe « The Walking Plaster Dispenser - July 5, 2010

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